A Californian artist, whose abstract paintings of nude women have been removed from exhibition in a Long Beach gallery after her work caused an outbreak of vomiting among visitors, has said that if her pictures are not immediately put back on display she will paint even more of them.

“It’s not the nipples that bother us,” said local resident Randy Fokker, “it’s the paintings themselves. This woman can’t paint. These pictures are one rung down from human excrement. They stink.”

The amateur artist, known as Christiana Correggio (above right), has defended her work, saying “Aw, come on. The art market is full of paintings far worse than mine. I mean look at that Richard Prince guy. And what about Marlene Dumas? I mean how long have you got?”

The gallery owner, Tatyana Titsup, now faces a tough decision – re-hang a few crapulous amateur nudes that are a clear danger to public health, or refuse to do so, thereby inciting the artist into painting even more of them. It's a toughie.

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